Check Stand 3

Hey. How’s it goin’?

My God her fingernails are long. And bright. I didn’t know they still made neon pink nail polish. Girls don’t paint their fingernails anymore do they? And all that makeup she’s wearing. Maroon lipstick, blush, orange eye shadow. Those eye brows have to be drawn on. They are so thin. Friendly eyes though. Big green eyes.

Are you going to need a bag for this?

How’s she going to manage to eat her lunch with those fingernails. I wonder how she’ll manage to dip these carrot sticks in the salad dressing without loosing one of those press-on nails in the process. Are they real or fake? They are so long. They are starting to curl. Curly fingernails. I dig 'em. She probably hires someone with short nails to hand feed her. I have short fingernails... Naw, I bet she has a servant, maybe a butler or something that follows her around spoon feeding her and turning the pages in her fashion magazines. She’s probably got an Englishman for a butler. One of those really, severely British guys with a big pointy nose and stiff, thick accent. Not like Mr. Belvedere or Alfred, but Harrison Ford... if he were British. He’s Probably a spy type, with a chiseled body hidden under a black house suit and bow tie.

I bet she’s into working men though-- like a guy that knows how to build a deck. That’s why the butler isn’t here getting her lunch, he is too busy building her a redwood deck. He is probably sawing right now. This is probably his lunch. I need to learn how to build stuff. Maybe I could take some carpentry classes at the city college. Maybe ceramic.

Your total is…eight forty eight.

She’s got to be a rock star--or a celebrity hair stylist. What is she doing shopping here? I bet I would meet a lot of women like her if I went to the city college. The place is probably swarming with ‘em. I have to get out of this place.

Really though, if I had a butler of my own, I’d never leave my estate. I would start collecting swords. I would have a whole room for just my swords. And there would be cool lighting to showcase all the my expensive swords. Up-lighting, down-lighting. I’d even line the room with cabinets--ceramic sword racks. I’ll work on that as a school project . And my butler won’t be a man, I’ll hire a maid instead--a shield maiden. We’ll spend our afternoons fencing in the courtyard. Or maybe she can help me with my pottery.

Hey, this girl could bring her butler and we could have a double date. I’ll order my shield maid to search the butler though, can’t have him wearing a wire tap or something. I should ask her out. Yeah. Ask her. Ask her. Well, really I have so much going on now, I mean with my sculpting and sword hobbies. Maybe when I get settled at city college then I will have time for women. She’s sure got friendly green eyes though.

Thanks. Have a good one.